This wasn't supposed to be my first post of the new year and that book wasn't supposed to be my first of the new year, but it happened! Yesterday as I was moving about my work space, my eyes caught a book that had become a decoration on my desk. In fact, a cluster of books has become a conglomeration that has served as a base for a printer, book ends for junk mail and remain an aspiration in my quest to read more book or one day even write one of my own.
This morning it happened, I cracked open O.S. Hawkins' "VIP". I'm only into the first section of the book, but with it I made a realization. December 2018 was a month where I let it all hang out! The good, bad and ugly! I closed emotional chapters unapologetically and sought out what was best for me. I also made the decision to become my best self, also unapologetically. I decided that I will do a better job staying in touch but will also let some connections end, as they must.
In December for possibly the first time in my life, I asked: "what about what I think?" What about what I bring to the table?" And, "what about what I want?"
For years, living the life of a believer I tried to do my best at not pleasing everyone but accommodating everyone. I haven't done it successfully, just ask my wife. She's the marker by which I judge the aspiration to be accommodating. I have failed miserably in that area and can finally see myself doing better.
Still, I've gone years making room for everyone else-as most of us do. It felt selfish to finally ask myself what I wanted and put it first for a change. My latest rant was one where I communicated like a grown man was a bit uncomfortable because of the situation. It was a hard conversation but I had to speak up and own what I felt. It felt good, though not reassuring.
The Lord has quite a way of keeping us in check, though! Putting yourself first can be healthy, but as most of us know through history, it is almost always destructive. So here I find myself on the third day of a new year...reading about not my own importance, but my influence!
Did you see the piano falling over on me, like I did?!? God also has a sense of humor! To me, this read is not about how to assert my importance, but how instead leverage my influence! Oh yes, that mirror on the wall isn't telling me how beautiful I am, it's appraising my true obedience to God!
You will never be as important as you think you are if you're never able to influence anyone! I've perused Dale Carnegie's "How to Win Friends and Influence People" in search of various leadership methods and to enrich everyday engagement. Hawkins' book however has stung me in the worst way! As a writer, influence is my currency. Much of what I write is from the perspective of influencing people to do what I wrote about (watch a show, listen to a song, purchase a product), or to shape an opinion based on my influence on the reader.
Many of us seek to become influencers. Whether it's achieved is up to you and God! Hawkins shares in his book that God has given all of us something by which we'll achieve or increase our influence (2 Corinthians 10:13.15), it's our job to see to it that we do it! Guess what else I found out...that's what's important to God!
FRUIT! If you want people to eat from your table, you have to extend the invitation. What is the invitation? Is it you proclaiming your importance? NO! I've noticed that people want to see an unseen invitation before they ever acknowledge any level of "importance", perceived or otherwise. Our life speaks, our work speaks and so do our results! Many times, if people have to ask what you do, you're not as important as you think you are! Also, if you're the most "important" person in the room, you need to get out more! If you are regularly in "the room" and are seldom taking notes (written or recorded), you need some new rooms! For most of us, our importance will be derived from our our presence in the room- the fact that we're in the room and influence on those on the outside. The other side of the coin is: SERVICE. Fruit and service...we all want to feel wanted and even needed. I get that. But here's the deal: Your service to the world, should be just that, but it should also be appealing, appetizing even. The fruit of your service will ultimately yield not the importance you desire, but the influence you have been entrusted.
Well, it was fun feeling important! It was fun watching the phone ring and send the calls to voicemail...but back to work I go! Not back to doing what I was doing, but to work doing no, proving the "good and acceptable, and perfect will of God (Romans 12:2) in my life. In this way, through my newfound influence, I can provoke others to good works (Hebrews 10:24)!
If you would like to join me in this very short read, grab a copy of your own. The book is available online at Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Lifeway and other major bookstores.
Yep, I Said It!
When I have something to say, I often say it. Many times, I try to find the best way to say it. Other times, there's just no easy way to say a hard thing. My journey in life has made me a person with much to say and the person people least want to hear it from.